Emotions in the Workplace:

Principles to Guide Leaders

Principle Two:  Prepare Your Thoughts for Action

Leaders high in emotional strength create a positive emotional climate around them by preparing their thoughts for action.  Through preparation, a leader can assure that in a tense situation their actions will line up with their values.  When this happens, the outcome is most always positive.

Handling Your Reactions

We all experience frustration in getting our jobs done.  People we work with may not always meet our expectations and circumstances don’t always line up the way we had hoped. The pressures of performance can be overwhelming and get you off course.  The following story illustrates unusual grace under pressure…

Nicolo Paganini was  a well–known and gifted 19th century violinist, and reputed for his showmanship.  His most memorable concert was in Italy with a full orchestra.  He was performing before a packed house and his technique was incredible, his tone fantastic and his audience dearly loved him.  Toward the end of his concert, he was astounding the audience with a magnificent piece when suddenly one string on his violin snapped and hung limply from his instrument.  Paganini frowned briefly, shook his head, and continued to play, improvising beautifully.  Then to everyone’s surprise, a second string broke.  And shortly thereafter, a third.  Almost like a slapstick comedy, Paganini stood there with three strings dangling from his Stradivarius. But instead of leaving the stage, Paganini stood his ground and calmly completed the difficult number on the one remaining string.

Perhaps you didn’t think of yourself as a “performer” in the artistic sense. They say that true leadership is both an art and a science. Where does that kind of skill come from?  Not by accident, but by mastery—mastery over one’s thoughts, feelings and reactions.

What “Masters” You?

Think about the last few days of your life at work and see if you can recall any situations that triggered you:

• Disappointment in another’s performance
• Finding out someone betrayed you in some way
• A customer/colleague/boss acts unreasonably
• The ethics of another disturbs you
• Fear creeps in about an upcoming deadline
• Regret over something you said or the way you handled a situation

And I am guessing that all happened in just one day!

Track it!

Last month, in the applications section of Principle One:  Self Awareness, I suggested you build a list of situations at work that sparked emotional reactions or were difficult to resolve.  The purpose of this tool is to build your self awareness of what happens to you in the course of the day. By tracking these for 21 days, you can get enormous insight into what you typically deal with and how it impacts you.  That is the first step towards gaining mastery over your reactions.   (click here to request that tool)

Integrity:  Actions Line Up With Values

Now we are addressing what it takes to manage your thoughts so that your actions are a reflection of your values.  Isn’t that what “integrity” is?  See this definition from Encarta Dictionary:

Integrity:

1. Possession of firm principles
   The quality of possessing and steadfastly adhering to high moral principles or professional standards.
2. Completeness
   The state of being complete or undivided
3. Wholeness
   The state of being sound or undamaged

So “preparing your thoughts for action”, the second principle for leaders to deal with emotions in the workplace, results in being complete and whole or undamaged!

Mastery Over Reactions

In the model below, you can take any ONE of your triggers and insert it in place of the sample I provided.  See how, unexamined, it leads to greater frustration and no solution.

In the model below, one examines their reactions and works to get to a more objective position.  Not a “pie in the sky” or simply  positive thinking, but a place where you can stand and from that viewpoint take action from your standards and values.

Application

• Take one difficult situation and apply this model from diagnosing your Reactive Belief Cycle to designing a Thoughtful Belief Cycle.
• Plan your next steps in writing to address the issue with the person(s) involved

About the Author: Elaine Siciliano Morris is principal consultant and founder of Sea Change Inc, an organizational effectiveness firm based in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. A frequent keynote speaker and workshop presenter on leadership, corporate culture and personal growth, Elaine works with leaders and their teams to create productive and rewarding work environments. More information about her is available on her website: www.seachangecoach.com, or contact Elaine by phone at 972-407-0648.