Emotions In The Workplace
EMPLOYEES ARE MOST EFFECTIVE WHEN THEY LIKE
WHERE THEY WORK!
TRUE OR FALSE?
Every audience I ever asked gave a resounding YES!
And, not surprisingly, it is emotions that are at the root of how people feel in an organization—how people express themselves, how the leaders behave and react, what is acceptable and traditional. These are known as the “norms” of the culture—or, how we do things around here.
In addition, statistics show that the feel of a company, has a direct link to the bottom line
A study of executives in a multinational products company illustrated the link between positive climates and performance indicators. At the start of the fiscal year, each executive was given financial targets for his or her unit to meet. Bonuses for the execs and their team were directly tied to these performance measures. At the close of the fiscal year, the analysis showed a positive correlation between the climate dimensions and performance measures. In other words, regardless of country, the units with the better climates produced better financial results. (Hay McBer,1995)
In a study of CEO’s of a major life insurance organization, the climate they generated for their direct reports predicted the performance of the entire organization. The companies were divided into two groups: those with positive climates and those with average climates. In this study, climate alone was able to correctly sort if the company was a high performance or low performance company 69 percent of the time. This percentage was increased to 75 percent accuracy when specific variables were focused on.
(Hay McBer Study, 1995)
EMOTIONS ARE UNAVOIDABLE
Everyone has a mind that thinks and a mind that feels. Learning how to have these two parts of your own mind work together more effectively is a criterion for long-term success. The part of your mind that feels is called EMOTIONS…
Webster defines EMOTIONS as:
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A mental state that arises spontaneously rather than through conscious effort
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A state of mental agitation or disturbance.
COMMON CAUSES OF NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN THE WORKPLACE
Negative emotions in the workplace are not uncommon. In fact, they are very common. Relationships go sour, people gossip, bad feelings develop between bosses and employees, conflicts occur between co-workers, new people feel left out, someone thinks they are undermined, another feels not heard….anger, frustration and stress happen quite easily at work. It’s probably why “Happy Hour” was invented in the first place.
What are the most common causes of out-of-control emotions in the workplace? Typically it is the affect of one person in a negative emotional state. It may be the boss, or the office manager, or a peer or an employee. He or she may be in a one down position, have poor leadership skills, weak coping skills, or he/she may be experiencing a personal life crisis, have addictions or just a bad attitude. You’ve heard it said that you can LEAD from any level. Well unfortunately, the same is true in terms of having a negative affect on the environment. Anyone in a workplace environment can bring everyone else down. Although studies do show that leaders have the most influence on setting the tone.
I once coached a person who was the highest producer in the company. He was very talented, and effective in many ways. But he would often lose his temper or tear down people in front of others. People were terrified by him. One minute he was the most charming person in the place and the next moment, he would tear into you.
I worked with another leader, a female manager who was also very talented and quite experienced in her field. But her relationships with people suffered. Whenever she had to give someone corrective feedback she did it in such an ugly way, people didn’t like her or respect her anymore.
I have a close relative who works with a woman who is so moody that if she is having a bad day, which is 3 days out of 5, she will withhold information people need to get their jobs done.
I know of an administrative assistant who constantly complains to her boss that she is unhappy, has too much to do, and doesn’t like his attitude. Her boss has bent over backwards to try to please her, but to no avail.
EMOTIONS ARE CONTAGIOUS
People who have strong negative emotions influence the moods and reactions of those around them. Daniel Goleman, in his landmark book, Primal Leadership, said this:
“Scientists have captured this attunement of emotions in the laboratory by measuring the physiology – such as heart rate - of two people as they have a good conversation. As the conversation begins, their bodies each operate at different rhythms. But by the end of a simple 15 minute conversation, their physiological profiles look remarkably similar—a phenomenon called MIRRORING. This happens strongly in the downward spiral of a conflict, when there is anger and hurt and more subtly during pleasant interactions. It happens hardly at all during an emotionally neutral discussion. For example, when three strangers sit facing each other in silence for a minute or two, the one who is most emotionally expressive transmits his or her mood to the other two—without speaking a word.
The same effect holds in the office, boardroom, or shop floor; people in groups at work inevitably “catch” feelings from one another, sharing everything from jealousy and envy to angst or euphoria. The more cohesive the group, the stronger the sharing of moods, emotional history and even hot buttons.
APPLICATION:
Hold a discussion with your team regarding the climate and the emotional tone of your workplace and what impact it has on productivity and results. Ask such questions as:
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What kinds of moods generally prevail around here? Are they more positive or negative?
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What kinds of things happen to create stress and ill feelings?
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What is the real impact on our work? Ourselves? For our customers? The bottom line?
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What is the quality of our communication? Is there gossip, undermining, complaining?
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What is the tone of our meetings?
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Brainstorm ways to improve the areas that are negative. Consider creating some “rules of engagement” in which everyone agrees that these are the behaviors that are acceptable and which ones are not acceptable.
Principles for Leaders
Principle #1: Develop High Self Awareness
“The job of leaders is to think from their heads, communicate from their hearts, and act from their guts.”
- David R. Gaster
This quote captures the enormous and complex mission of today’s leaders. Emotional Intelligence studies have become so popularized because today’s business climate requires well developed influencing and communication skills. It is a leaders’ ability to be in touch with their own emotions that give them the insight to deal with a wide array of situations. Here is a good definition of Self Awareness:
“SELF-AWARENESS: Reading one’s own emotions and recognizing their impact; using “gut sense” to guide decisions.
Leaders high in emotional self-awareness are attuned to their inner signals, recognizing how their feelings affect them and their job performance. They are attuned to their guiding values and can often intuit the best course of action, seeing the big picture in a complex situation. Emotionally self-aware leaders can be candid and authentic, able to speak openly about their emotions or with conviction about their guiding vision.”
(Primal Leadership, Daniel Goleman)
AWARENESS GIVES YOU INFORMATION
Your emotions can give you valuable information about yourself, other people and situations. An angry outburst from an employee can let you know he is feeling overwhelmed by the workload. Anxiety about an upcoming presentation may warn you about the preparation that is needed. Sensing frustration from a client may let you know there is an important service issue to address. An uncomfortable feeling with a potential employee may tell you they are not being authentic.
“By tapping into the information that your emotions provide, you are able to alter your behavior and thinking in such a way that you can turn situations around.”
(Emotional Intelligence at Work, Henrie Weisinger, Ph.D.)
SELF AWARENESS IS THE BUILDING BLOCK OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
“To be conscious that you are ignorant is a great step to knowledge.”
- Benjamin Disraeli
It’s not a crime to admit weakness and in fact, this is the pathway to the next level of growth. People who refuse to acknowledge weaknesses are not “growers” and often cause people to distrust them. They work hard to keep up the façade of being perfect and keep people from being close to them. Ultimately their weaknesses do catch up with them and then they don’t have people close enough to them for support.
STRENGTH COMES FROM ACKNOWLEDGING WEAKNESS
A leader I know asked his key executive team the tough question: “In what ways do I get in the way of our success?” They were a bit reluctant to answer, and so he asked them to make a list of the top 7 traits they needed from him. Once they all agreed on the top 7 he then asked them to rate him on a 1-5 scale in each competency they chose. He took that information and focused on two things to improve that were critical—keeping them abreast on important matters, and becoming a better listener. Both related to communication. He thought he was a terrific communicator. He was. He was also well liked. But his tendency to run ahead without sharing information left his team in the dark and, like many CEO’s, he tended to talk too much. Each month they rated him and his scores went up consistently. He set the tone for self improvement and truth telling. When it came time to give each of his team members feedback it was easier to be candid and they were far more open to receiving what he had to say. He had modeled how a successful person keeps growing.
“My life is like one big obstacle course with me being the chief obstacle.”
- Jack Paar
APPLICATION
Where are you and your team with regard to self-awareness? Here are some steps you can take to increase your self awareness. (For specific resources on these tools, click here to contact us)
- Have a 360 degree feedback conducted on yourself. This will tell you what your strengths and gaps are. Engage a reputable coach to review your feedback and create a developmental plan.
- Take a personality or styles assessment, like the Myers Briggs, DISC instrument or Strong Interest Survey.
- Develop a list of situations at work that sparked emotional reactions or were difficult to resolve. Write a few sentences for each situation describing what happened, how you felt, what you said, what the other person said, how it turned out. Look for themes and possible triggers so that you can learn to modify your reactions in similar situations in the future. (For a tool to track these triggers, click here to contact Elaine)
- Set aside a half hour daily for prayer and/or meditation.
- Keep a journal to record insights, feelings, and daily situations
About the Author: Elaine Siciliano Morris is principal consultant and founder of Sea Change Inc, an organizational effectiveness firm based in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. A frequent keynote speaker and workshop presenter on leadership, corporate culture and personal growth, Elaine works with leaders and their teams to create productive and rewarding work environments. More information about her is available on her website: www.seachangecoach.com, or contact Elaine by phone at 972-407-0648.
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